Sacrifices

Lately I have really been questioning my motives for doing good things. Why do I get so angry sometimes when I keep giving and giving and for what? What will really happen? Who really cares anyway? I came to a bit of an epiphany recently. I do not have to sacrifice the blessings I receive because I feel guilty or for the approval of others but because I want to.

I know that sounds like the easiest concept. Most of you are probably think geez Nicole get a clue...But it was huge for me. So many times I do stuff for the approval of others. Do stuff because I feel guilty. I sacrifice my time, my resources and other things because I feel like I have to not because I want to. Life has been so much easier understanding that I do not have to run this rat race. That my self-worth does not come from what others think of me or from all the stuff I do, especially if I do it with wrong motives!

This might sound selfish but I am starting to do what I enjoy, what I love to do. Because I want to do it. Because it gives me great joy. And I started discipling girls at my church and that is the greatest joy to me. So God does give us the desires of our hearts after all. I am blown away that leading a women's bible study and discipling because I want to has fulfilled me more than words can describe.

Wow, God is good! I guess He does tell the truth...